Pretty Please
by kci47
Summary: Hermione has something Snape wants - but how will he get it? Written for the "Colorful Phrases" competition on HPFC. AU, post-DH, one-shot.


Severus paused outside the staffroom door and took a deep breath. He dreaded what he was about to do, but there was no alternative: it had to be done. Bracing himself and remembering what was at stake, he strode inside.

Hermione was sitting in an armchair on the far side of the room. The spot under the window was her favorite for afternoon reading. The realization that he knew her habits was unsettling, to say the least.

"Miss Granger, may I have a word?" He stood by her chair, impatiently tapping his fingers on the opposite sleeve. When she did not immediately put down her book and answer him, he found his irritation rising. She always seemed to provoke this reaction in him – it was the reason he usually went out of his way to irritate _her_.

Taking a moment to subdue his agitation – he needed to keep his goal in mind – he started to speak again. "Miss Granger, I asked if I may-"

"It's Professor Granger," Hermione corrected. She slowly marked her place in her book before turning her face up to his. "I have been a professor here for nearly two years, Severus; surely you can manage to address me properly by now?"

He had to bite back his retort. She had encouraged him to call her Hermione, but he had staunchly refused. He did not allow himself to accept the fact that she was a grown woman now (and oh, he had noticed), and speaking to her as though she was still a student was the best way to avoid recognizing her as an adult – _as a desirable woman_, his inner voice whispered. _Not now! _his logical side argued. _Focus, Severus! She has what you want. _He did not want to concede this point to her, but he could _not _afford to antagonize her, not until she agreed to his demands... er, requests.

"I beg your pardon," he said stiffly. "_Professor _Granger, I wondered if I may speak with you privately?" He congratulated himself on sounding polite.

He watched as a small crease appeared between Hermione's eyebrows, and she looked around the room before looking back up at him. "We _are _speaking privately," she said, sounding confused.

Severus gritted his teeth together. He was not _about _to have this discussion in the staffroom, where anyone could just walk in on them. "Miss- Ah, Professor Granger, I would prefer to speak with you regarding a sensitive subject, and was hoping that we might move somewhere quieter." She seemed about to refuse, so he added, "Please." It pained him, but it was necessary.

She seemed surprised by his plea, but she nodded and stood to follow him. He strode out the door, remembering at the last second to turn around and hold it for her to pass through. A small twitch of her mouth suggested that she found his amusing, but thankfully she remained silent as he led her towards his office.

That was something else he'd noticed and subsequently ignored about Hermione Granger, the professor. She was quieter and more reserved than she had been while she was a student. She still asked an irritating number of questions on a daily basis, but her general amount of chatter had decreased markedly. However, he needled her about her incessant regurgitating of information at every chance he got. It was one of his few joys in life, watching her cheeks flush in the heat of argument.

When they arrived at his office, he once again gestured her through the doorway, and this time she did grin. He pulled out the lone visitor's chair for her, cringing slightly when it creaked as she settled on it. He purposefully kept the most uncomfortable chair in the castle to discourage anyone from visiting with him. He moved to sit behind his desk, but that felt too formal. He started to perch on the edge of the desk, instead, but he felt foolish in the extreme. He settled for standing a not-too-imposing distance away from her.

"I admit I'm intrigued, Severus," she said to break the silence. "What did you want to speak with me about?"

Here it was, his big chance. He reminded himself to remain calm and polite or else the girl would never agree to give him what he needed. "It has come to my attention that you are in possession of several books that belonged to the Headmaster," he said. He ruthlessly tamped down the observation that she was pretty when she blushed, as she was now turning a lovely shade of pink.

"They didn't belong to the Headmaster," she said defensively. "They were library books that Dumbledore had removed and was storing in his office. If he didn't want anyone to have them, he wouldn't have allowed them to be Summonable." She crossed her arms as though daring him to contradict her. All he noticed was the delectable way this framed her cleavage.

"Be that as it may, I would like the _Lost Arte of Ancient Potions_ text for my research." He decided not to argue with her about who rightfully owned the books.

Hermione tilted her head ever so slightly as she considered him. "No," she said.

Severus blinked twice, wondering if his hearing was finally going. "No?" he asked.

"No." She stood and began to pace. "I can't help but feel that Dumbledore wanted us – wanted me – to have those books several years ago when we were on the run," she explained. "Even his portrait has indicated that he left them in his office for that very reason. I'm not comfortable loaning them out, even to someone as meticulous as you. Surely you understand?"

He could not believe her effrontery. He was a respected Potions master, a professor of this school, and an overly cautious sort of man, besides! He was about to threaten her when he remembered Lucius' advice when dealing with women: _be nice, and let them believe they are in control_.

"Prof- Hermione, naturally I agree with you that these books should not be loaned out to just anyone. It is my understanding that the collection you Summoned from Dumbledore's office contains many old and obscure texts, all deemed unsafe for public perusal by Dumbledore himself. However, surely we can agree that were he alive, Dumbledore would allow me to view this particular book?" He knew he sounded like he was begging, and he tried not to sneer.

She stopped pacing and met his gaze. "Severus, I – I'm sorry, but I just don't know if it's a good idea," she said softly.

He pressed his lips together in frustration. It was clear he needed to increase his efforts. "I appreciate your concern." Each word was like swallowing a mouthful of nails. "I – admire – your adherence to your beliefs." This was utterly humiliating, and painful. "You are welcome to watch me while I work. Please, I would be eternally grateful." He gave her what he hoped was his best "puppy dog" expression, but admittedly it was a long shot since he couldn't remember the last time he'd had to resort to such measures.

It must not have worked, because her laughter echoed around the room. She took a disconcerting number of steps towards him, and he stiffened. "Oh, Severus, you're such a terrible flatterer!" She was still giggling. He would _not _find it adorable, he would _not_.

"Fine. I neither admire nor appreciate your adherence to your ridiculous notions of 'preserving the sanctity of the books' or whatever it is you're telling yourself. I need that text, woman!" he growled.

"Tsk tsk, I think I liked it better when you were attempting to brown-nose me," she chided him. She took another step closer and he schooled his features to remain passive, even as he was feeling terribly flustered by her closeness. "Perhaps if you offered me something in return for viewing the text?" she prompted him.

"How Slytherin of you," he sneered. She only grinned in response.

"I've picked it up from you, I'm afraid," she admitted unabashedly. "So what'll it be? Please keep in mind that watching you work, while fascinating, is hardly motivation for me to part with my treasured books."

He ran her words through his mind again to make sure he'd heard her correctly. She thought he was fascinating? That had to be the first time anyone had thought so. Clearing his throat, he racked his brain for something to offer her.

"I shall – provide you with unlimited access to my potions stores," he said, certain this would entice her.

"Hmm. While your approval would be nice, you're forgetting that I've been taking what I wanted from your private storeroom – without your permission – since I was twelve," she reminded him.

He frowned. "How impertinent of you," he chastised her. The bothersome girl only smiled. "Why don't you just tell me what you want, and then we can be on with it?"

"How Gryffindor of you," she teased him.

"Hermione-" His warning tone was not lost on her, as she smiled again and answered him.

"Oh, Severus, you really aren't as astute as everyone thinks," she sighed. "What I want, in return for giving you the potions text, is dinner with you."

Relieved, he allowed the merest hint of grin to cross his features. "Thank you," he said, willing to be magnanimous now that she had granted him access to the text. "Will any evening suffice? We do normally sit together at dinner in the Great Hall, after all, so perhaps after dinner this evening you can bring me the book-"

But she was shaking her head. "I meant that I want you to take me to dinner. Privately. Not in the school." Her tone was the same overly-explanatory one she used with her first-years.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "That sounds suspiciously like-"

"A date, yes," she stated boldly. He prided himself on never showing surprise, but he knew at this moment that his eyebrows were up near his hairline.

"You – you want – to go on a date with – _me_?" He could not contain his skepticism.

She nodded emphatically. "Tomorrow night would be acceptable," she plowed on.

He needed to regain control of this situation. Surely she was having him on? Beautiful young witches did _not _desire to go on dates with Severus Snape. "Miss Granger, I hardly think that-"

"We're back to 'Miss Granger', are we?" Her look was far too perceptive. "Do I make you uncomfortable, Severus?" she asked as she sidled even closer. There were only inches separating them now.

"Yes," he answered before he could stop himself. "Quite." His mouth was not listening to his brain. "Very, very uncomfortable." This was embarrassing.

She had the grace not to tease him. Stroking one hand down his arm, she stepped back. "Dinner. Tomorrow evening. And you can continue to flatter me to ensure that I'm in a mood to show you the text afterwards... if you're still thinking about the book afterwards." The cheeky girl winked at him before exiting his office.

As the door shut behind her, Severus leaned his head against the wall. What had just happened? In all his thoughts of how she would take his request, he had never imagined _this_. Blast – and now he'd have to think up some more compliments.

He hadn't looked forward to an evening more in a very long time.

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><p><strong>AN: Written for the Colorful Phrases Competition on HPFC. My phrase was "brown-nosing". I'm not JK Rowling, obviously, or else a Severus/Hermione relationship would have been canon.** **And Snape would have many, many more speaking parts.** **Yumm, Snape's voice...**


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